Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Hillary Clinton’s “Outrun You” Strategy

There’s an old joke among hikers; maybe some of you couch potatoes have heard it too.  Two guys are out on the trail when they suddenly cross paths with a grizzly.  The bear rears up and prepares to charge.  Hiker A turns to Hiker B and says, “Quick!  My running shoes are in your pack.  I need them!”  Says B: “Don’t be stupid.  You can’t outrun a bear!”  Replies A: “I don’t need to outrun the bear—I just need to outrun you.”

Which is entirely doable if your fellow hiker is Donald Trump.


Sandwichman said...

Hiker B then runs off with the shoes in his pack.

Unknown said...

"The National Park Rangers are advising hikers in Glacier National Park and other Rocky Mountain parks to be alert for bears and take extra precautions to avoid an encounter.
They advise park visitors to wear little bells on their clothes so they make noise when hiking. The bell noise allows bears to hear them coming from a distance and not be startled by a hiker accidentally sneaking up on them. This might cause a bear to charge.
Visitors should also carry a pepper spray can just in case a bear is encountered. Spraying the pepper into the air will irritate the bear's sensitive nose and it will run away.
It is also a good idea to keep an eye out for fresh bear scat so you have an idea if bears are in the area. People should be able to recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear scat.
Black bear droppings are smaller and often contain berries, leaves, and possibly bits of fur. Grizzly bear droppings tend to contain small bells and smell of pepper."

Or as my Great Grandpa might have said (except he was a Gentleman Farmer with a big house in town): "Sometimes you get the b'ar and sometimes the b'ar gets you"